I dreamed

I was sitting among many
You pulled me up to dance

And I laughed and let the faces slide past
You drew me near and kissed my head

And I gasped, looked away
And hid my heart; 

and fled. 

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I’ve fought a thousand battles trying to find you, searching for some infinite desire that would anchor me to another

I found nothing and no one

Only dust. 

Just shadows full of twinkling promise,
Remnants of love; so I kept looking
And I discovered strength instead of companionship. 

Dignity instead of desire. 

Joy
in place of longing. 
And I am free of binding chains; now I search languidly, with expectation

Instead

Of desperation.