Wow, who am I
but a weeping sighing wind
what force do i have to impress the soil
or leave marks on the trees and their friends?
how can i but fade, bitter, lost
how can i but melt with the frost?
why should i stay, impermanent, cold
full of anger and sorrow and gold?
We worship you because you are not just
Softly bowing flower heads, in gentle winds
Or shimmering raindrops come to wash the soil.
You are also mighty oaks, borne of ancient years and deep roots
And lashing, torrential showers, full of power and promise.
You are ceaseless sunshine, yes
and neverending light
but you are also the deepest, calmest night
and the depths of every sea.
you are close to me.
you are awesome, terrifying power,
razing forests like rotten toothpicks.
breaking strong diamonds like gossamer,
your might incomprehensible.
yet from this same force of fury and storm
comes a grace with infinite limits
comes a mercy the like of which
no human has ever deserved.
we run to you, with fear of you
swept up in your love and forgiveness.
i bow at your feet, trembling
you calm my heart and anoint me.
i am unworthy
you are everything
i cannot fathom anything
Lord, King Jesus, Most High, Creator and King of Light, Son of God, God of Words and Life,
spare me and my human weakness.
spare me. i long to love you. i long to be near you. forgive me and accept me. i want you in my life, Lord. i reject and rebuke ungodly human desires. fill my soul with your presence
help everyone i have ever met or passed by to know you and come to accept you.
i need you Father. your son died to set me free. thank you for raising him from the dead. amen. in Jesus’ holy name. amen.
Alacrity cuts me down inside
Longing folds up my lungs.
Behind a golem mask I hide
Carved with words I’ve always sung.
Do not worry, do not fear
They can’t see the lava inside you.
Pack away your blood and tears,
The loneliness swept in golden hues.
And sing alone.
Ah, so what
Life and love are fleeting.
Give more then, and live
Like everyone deserves a second thought.
Grant love gracefully and shyly, with rhythms in your eyes
Tell them how you feel without shame or compromise.
Embrace the choice and now decide
To let love blaze within your eyes.
This is what it seems to be!
when all inflections bury me
engulfed in liquid sleep and stars
my mind scurries through burning hearts
i am tossed about the ground
flurrying on thought and sound
hidden tripping music weaves
a lonely caustic melody.
the words marched on my tongue
and beat a reluctant retreat
for after beating both my lungs
my teeth forced them into defeat.
someday somewhere the words will fare
far better than here they did;
i will not be able to hide in my hair
the love i refuse to admit.
Bleeding and broken and lashed with hatred, shame
Laughed at and mocked in the darkest of hours
As even father looked away.
Scorned and forgotten, abandoned by all
More alone than anyone has ever been.
Yet we cry out after a moment of darkness, a second of fear
We cannot stand to face the shadows on our own
you, You died in solitude to grant us a reprieve from the night
i cannot fathom how blessed i am to know this age, where you are so close and graceful
so kind and gentle
i know one day you will judge us all and i am NOT ENOUGH
I SCREAM THIS TRUTH, THE AGONY TORN FROM MY LUNGS WITH ALL ITS THORNS
YOU ARE A L L THAT I HAVE
AND YOU ARE MORE THAN ENOUGH
thank you …
Why, contemplation leaves me low
And bitter hearts still seek the cold.
I lose myself in time and sleep
An exhausted spirit is all I keep.
So let me in to warm my feet
And sit awhile beside the flames.
At once to rest and speak in peace
Forever safe in Your embrace.
I nod my head and fire climbs high
My eyelids flicker low.
I’m no longer out in the bitter cold —
You smile and drape over me Your coat.