New dawn

We shine like stars and right our wrongs, accepting joy and shunning blame

He blots out stains and soothes our pain

We climb the clouds like ladders as we sing our praising songs


The daylight is here and my fear

Should be gone

The darkness, like mist

Evaporates from the lawn

My star-gazing, sugar-cubes

Flung in the sky

The current of pain where the Milky Way lies

I should be whole and peaceful and still

Instead I choose tumult

and mudslicks, and the pills I abhor;

My hands gleefully wretched with dark oil-spills.

Let my heart still and stir the river no more.


So long now my days have cracked

Slowly now they’ve bent, exactly

When the shattering happened, I can’t

Be sure. But I know my illness grows

With every passing lure. I do not bite

Or worry, or hide

I simply watch with impassive eyes.

The currents drag me along by my skin, but

I don’t care enough to let them in, or

To fight the whirling flow. I

Do not swim, or sink, or float

I simply drown in the undertow, my lungs afloat

Within the pools of pain I try to escape.

Someday maybe I’ll

Breathe air again.

As long as i don’t



Difficult to verbalize,
Impossible to deny.
A growing, gnawing, empty-filling

Real, intense, dependent isolation;
A furiously strong intention.
Expanding truth, aching eyes,
Heavy hearts designed to cry.

This deepening, this flowing flood
This hurtling rush of dizzying blood.
The colors I see are monochromatic to me
Beside your eyes, the oceans I breathe.