I feel myself pulling away

Making up reasons not to stay

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Happy invisible illness awareness week

I still feel fake

Like I am a parade

What business do I have

Saying I’m not okay?

As healthy as I seem… My sickness can’t be seen.

My poison had no name

So WHO AM I TO CLAIM

“I can’t because I’m lame…”

To pass along the blame?

It is so hard to accept, to know

That I can ever say no…

Nightshivers

Tears through sleep, shivers that weep

I open my eyes, dissipating demise

The death was not real, the cold I could feel

All conjured up by my dreams.

I held his body, frozen solid

Claw marks on the door

The agonized scream, I knew she would weep

Senseless murder that I could not stop.

I tried to save you, I’m sorry, I failed

Your blood will be on my face, my sleeves

Like my ears are full of your mother’s wailing

And my eyes bled salt for your sake.