How long have now I slept
While worry-heart within me wept
And rattled the bars of its room
And clashed like a cymbal entombed
What bitter potion silvered my eyes
To such cataracts and cobwebs
They sugar-coated the ledge, they bled into my pupils and
My vision now strikes back,
each poem written reacts
With the phrases dilating my gaze.
My worries will all keep away.
These thoughts are not mine. If they intrude
One more time
I will cut them up and cast them down
Into the furthest depths of the sea;
Far, far away
Melting-me drips down my ribs
Myself withers and cracks my lips
my soul-glass chips and fogs
I stare down friends and family
as my Self slides down my bones
my heartbeat liquefies and loans
itself down to my
t o e s
My breath is blood and flame.
The bars can’t keep Them away.
The slow drum calls my fate!
The BEAT BERATES MY PACE
THE THUDDING COVERS MY SKIN
WE CAN NEVER
For that time I crushed you down
When you were just trying to help;
I was too concerned with me and Flattery:
My will became my pride, and
I looked down at you, a moment that seizes my heart with pain
To this day.
You wanted nothing more than to make me proud and help me out
And I shut you down.
I am gross and a coward. And my pain is pronounced
An ache to write that consumes my eyes
It rips and rends my flesh in twain
A gaping longing empty hurting
To fill with perfect porcelain phrase.
I Must Write Or
I Will Die
My screaming ink-blood boils inside
Why are words so cruel and quick
Why do they prowl and lick their lips
WHY CANT WE LEASH THEM, kEEP THEM IN
THEIR HANDLES CUT OUR WEAKENED SKIN
we bleed and find ourselves again…
Lava eyes and looking-fires
My skin shivers and cracks
I scream inside for restless light
And instead i lack delight
Light and bright and roamin g eyes my colors fade and bleed and break
I want to feel things more than bleeding but the slow-deep cannot wait
I will try to make my feelings clear
But there’s a whirling dervish of worry in here
My anger expands to protect my soul
Caged by my ribs, it shivers and glows
How dare you. How dare you
Memories are not trash
You expect to be treated like family
Stop being ashamed of love!
Love is not weakness, it is wild roaring strength
It takes nothing to be nothing, to let the wind blow your stars away
It takes raging courage to feel and scream aloud that love
Stop waiting! Stop playing! Don’t pretend for fear of hurt
You do not have to be loved to love
It does not need to be returned.