Can. I drift. Away. Someplace
Calling friends new and old
Can I float down every stairwell
Ever built, destroyed, or wrought to sell
Can I curl up inside my wretchedness
Among the thoughts that call me
Can I give in to the pounding rain
That floods my brain and calls my name
Can I let it drown me again?
Who will stop me if I let them in?
For a moment, my veins were on fire
Alight with Your power and might.
I had been swept by the threat of the Enemy’s wings;
His beauty, his torment, his plight
You will die, he whispered to me
Very soon, and painfully.
I know not what he expected, nor
What singing fear was rebuked.
But the threats did not sting
For my heritage brings
Courage; the heartiest thing.
I SNARLED “so be it then,
I’ll die as I lived,
Shouting praise to the King!”
For He does not bow to your suffering.
How hard is it to mend
A mind once bent and
Torn? Is it possible to sew
Each neural fabric, a mental
My mouth no longer allows a plea
A few eyes are all that’s left of me
Deathly primary shock, the ending freeze
Exquisite numbness is what will finish things.
Make someone a murderer. Distance yourself.
Each person ignores the ones they could help.
Dear one, knock!
Enter if you will.
Anybody sent by God
Does naught but bear goodwill.
How pleasant a task,
Every prisoner asks
“Let me go free! Absolved of all things!”
Poisoner or poisonee… we all need
Will I ever
Be happy? My payments never
Seem to end
I cannot seek the resting, because
My debt will not descend
Have not I paid the dues this earth
Has called us all to pay?
Have not my sufferings yet been sufficient
Been enough- for a lifetime- each day?
I will wait, Palms upward, feet aching and bruised
I will surrender my heartache and tremors and
I cannot see an end to this tunnel, nor a filling
Of my soul
Everything so empty now, I doubt
So I wait… in pain… and praise.
I am not a belonger in this place
I cannot imagine a berth in such space
My heart twists and yearns, the greediness turns
But nobody knows better than I-
This place was not meant for my mind-
I do not belong, I should continue to roam
I know this Feeling is not my home.
Emotions are fickle, they twist and they whine
They scratch at our faces and weep from our eyes
I know not to trust them, I know they are false
Like the hearth of this Emotion will never be a HOUSE.
I do not I do not I do not
If they call this a home, I will
Leave this sand for the stone.
Let us love not with vigor, or emotion, or with zest
Let us love not with impassioned words and hearts pounding in our chest
Let us love instead with sorrow and the heartbreakings of heaven,
Each added soul a brimming whole
Of halves and broken edges.
Let us love with all our purpose and our glances and our restings
Let us love with every one in world envisioned like the best
Let us love like nothing ever happened and nothing ever will;
Let us love as wide and far as the east is from the west.
Like God in Earth heals our hurts,
Let us love
There has been no thing lost
That He can not restore.
There will never be so high a cost
That He would not pay for.
You are covered and renewed
There is only freedom now for you.