Release

It feels so strange.

For so long I have sought disconnection, relief

Thinking the land turned about me

Now new soil greets my feet, an ocean’s expanse

And still the churning – thrashing – burning

No matter how I flee I cannot escape the bleed

No matter where I run I am seen by the

Same

Knowing

Sun

How can I heal? Will this ever cease? Please let me find some

Semblance

Of peace

Advertisements

Island

I do not need to make all things so real

In an effort to anchor, I let everything

Feel

Personal, true

It’s crazy, it subdues

How can one person bear the weight of a billion wrongs?

How can two trembling hands

count the words of endless songs?

Two bony shoulders cannot straighten under the weight

Of every single human beings’ worst moment and mistake.

I must stop anchoring myself to loss

To suffering, and breakage, and torment without cause.

What business have I to empathize

With every one at once?

If I do not break to clean my faith

It will crumble, like dust, all at once.

Hope

Whoa, what bitterness is this

Whose twisted thoughts have I trekked in?

Surely this darkness isn’t mine,

This want for aching, wasted time

Someday I’ll be solid, healed

Someday the nightmares won’t be there to steal

If the nights are silent, the days reveal

Endless screaming from the ones repealed

Some time night and day alike

Will toss their haunting-juggling storms

Aside

And all the worry and fear I despise

Will finally

Entirely

Subside.

Relent

Can. I drift. Away. Someplace

Calling friends new and old

Disgrace

Can I float down every stairwell

Ever built, destroyed, or wrought to sell

Can I curl up inside my wretchedness

Among the thoughts that call me

Worthless

Can I give in to the pounding rain

That floods my brain and calls my name

Can I let it drown me again?

Who will stop me if I let them in?

Citsorca

How hard is it to mend

A mind once bent and

Torn? Is it possible to sew

Each neural fabric, a mental

Storm?

My mouth no longer allows a plea

A few eyes are all that’s left of me

Deathly primary shock, the ending freeze

Exquisite numbness is what will finish things.

Make someone a murderer. Distance yourself.

Each person ignores the ones they could help.

Dear one, knock!

Enter if you will.

Anybody sent by God

Does naught but bear goodwill.

How pleasant a task,

Every prisoner asks

“Let me go free! Absolved of all things!”

Poisoner or poisonee… we all need

Miraculous, priceless

Eternal… cleansing.

P

L

E

A

S

E

.

Quedar

Who doesn’t, won’t, and wants to be

Could I, would we, sweet disease

Want a new dollar, a shiny time-piece?

Me and my people can never be free.

As I sit still and the dripping-day starts

I cannot see past the daylight’s bright heart.

Am I a fool, or just on my own?

?Will you come to free me or leave me in stone?

Slain

I still think about you, wonder if my veins will ever forget

The way your hand felt pressed against my chest

how soft your skin was, how unreal the red seemed

Painted on his gloves, it weaves through my dreams

I have not tasted sleep since the night you came my way

I have not faced a dreamless land since the horror of that day

Every sundown, nightmares come to wriggle in my mind

I do not rest, I only wait

In agony for sunrise.