Dizzy

I think I’m

Bleeding

Inside again;

I think my heart is

Stumbling again;

I think my

Life is

Slipping away again.

I feel the blood-sail losing its wind

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Self-inflicted

What, of course, the acid burns my chest

The ice cubes melt my rest

I feel sick and dark instead

Colors blur my blood-beat, dead

The shadows bleed deep in my veins

I know now why my heartbeat strains

Constellation

One day soon my bones will dissolve

The tension inside will relax and resolve

I’ll breathe out some sparks and light up the dark

My hunger pangs ceasing as my rib cage departs.

Someday soon my pain will end

Each muscle releasing the screaming within

And every candle glowing in my blood

will rival the stars again.

Hospital

There is something in me that wants to return 
To the bleached white walls and the chemical-room
To the soft silent plain of the starched stiff sheets
And the endless night where I wake and sleep.

The waiting breeds new agony
But the sleeping-room brings me release
I warmly breathe in the numbed-up night
Where the painless hours finally find

Me. 

Wounded

Perhaps my Name will change again
And pity will flood their eyes. 
Maybe my gaze will scream, “I’m fine!”
While they shake their heads
 and smile. 

Who will I become? What new
Label will crawl into my blood
What stamp will march across my face 
And leave its inky, staining trace
What wrong allele now needs to be healed?

I burrow into sleep until the great reveal.